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Monday, December 04, 2006

SLOW DOWN

SLOOOOOWWWW DOWWWWWWWN for god's sake, world, slow down! I'm trying to live three lives here! Give a girl a break!

I'm still behind in schoolwork, but I managed to hand in a rough draft of my final composition and an extra credit analysis assignment for music theory class. On Friday, I put up drywall single-handedly on one wall of the kitchen. This is not as easy as it might seem - sheets of drywall fell on my head twice, and I also managed to fall off a chair and scrape my wrist. On Saturday I had to go to the BCIS (new name for the INS for those not in the know) in Philly and have my fingerprints and photo taken to support my application for a non-conditional Green Card.

I don't understand why every time I submit an application to the BCIS, they take my fingerprints. I guess it's because they collect $70 in addition to the application fees each time. This visit was particularly hilarious because of the person who took my biometrics, whom I estimate to have some sort of social disorder. He mostly spoke in words, not sentences, beginning with when he called me from the waiting area.

"Red. Seven. Seven. Red."

He spoke softly and monotonously. When he walked, his arms didn't move but hung rigid from his hunched shoulders. I followed him to a cubicle.

"Sit."

I sat down while he typed into a computer.

"Stand."

I stood up. He motioned for me to step closer. Instead of asking me to place my finger on the biometric reader, he picked up my hand and did it for me.

"Sit."

I returned to the chair. He pointed at the camera lens, and my eyes followed his finger. Click.

"(Mumble mumble) picture?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Do you want to see your picture." It wasn't really a question.

"Uh ... sure." I dutifully stood up again and looked at my headshot on the screen. He looked at me a little expectantly. "Uh ... it's fine ..?"

"Was everything all right with your visit today?" This was the longest string of words he had yet spoken, but his tone didn't change.

"Um ... yes ... thank you."

"Here's a card to fill out. Drop it in the box."

The card was a "How are we doing?" survey with a couple of questions, including "Was the service you received courteous?" I guess it was courteous. I mean, he wasn't rude. Just ... really weird. A little like obedience school. Matt thought maybe he was just one of those reluctant employees who don't want to be at work on a Saturday, but I think it was more than that.

Afterwards, we went to the Mutter Museum, which was delicious, and put us in the mood for Peking duck in Chinatown. If I'm ever on death row, the last meal I want to eat is Peking duck.

Speaking of delicious, it should be noted for future bragging rights that I am officially married to a male model. When girls model, they look like they're on coke; when guys model they just pretend to be drunk. This is the true meaning of gender roles in our society.

  • Take the CIA personality test. I am a daring thrill-seeker.

  • "Downtown" in Suburbia.We have something approaching this just down the road in Exton, though without the performance spaces and skating rinks. (Interesting sidenote - Westfield is actually an Australian company! When I saw Westfield over here, I just assumed it was a US company that had spread to Australia decades ago.)

  • Dark Crystal sequel!
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